New and ready to come to understand
Posted 03-25-2008 at 10:44 PM by Alyssa879
I am new to this type of lifestyle. My new boyfriend has always liked to be with different women, regardless of looks. He has explained to me that he just likes variety, something different. He says he doesn't like any type of emotional attachment, just show up have sex and leave. He doesn't care if I do the same as well and he also wants to try couple swapping. The biggest point he makes is that as long as we come home to eachother its ok. I guess I'm just having a hard time with the whole jelousy thing, it doesn't make a difference weather its in front of me or not, dealing with the fact that someone esle is bringing him pleasure and joy is what bothers me, and when I think about it, it almost sounds like I'm just bieng selfish, I want him to enjoy himself and do what makes him happy, he has always shown the same for me. I'm a nude dancer and he has always wanted me to to what makes me happy, not many guys are ok with that. I haven't tried going out on my own yet, I'm hoping once I do, I might come to understand that it is just sex and maybe that will take away my jelousy and Insecurity. I'm very open to this lifestyle and I really want to be ok with it. I don't want to feel jelous or insecure anymore because its just not a good feeling, quite annoying actually. Any advice would be great!
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| | Hey Alyssa, I'm a guy here so bare in mind I'm on the other side of perspectives. We go to strip clubs together and one of our playmates is in fact, a stripper at times.We didn't know that fact till after we had all got to know each other first, through the lifestyle. She dances in a club we have never been too...YET. We also have a niece that is in the business so don't confuse the two. They are totally separate situations. Our niece could talk to us, but we would never visit the club she dances in.. Cool. The thing I see is one, your boyfriend is a new boyfriend. There is probably allot you both still have to learn about each other with your trust levels. I cant imagine your boyfriends thoughts, without knowing him. We have different playmates from different situations in life. Some we may have met in a swinger club that the sex was before the friendship nothing more. The numbers are small with those situations. Even then, although we know nothing about them besides the sex we have had. It still leaves me\us if we should see them again with, "hey I know you" I mean there is always going to be more, than a stranger we fucked and don't know. There is still a connection even if its just sexual, right ? For the most part, the sexual playmates we have encountered are indeed friends. Mostly Bi females now. Sure they are closer to Mrs.fun as there is a connection between them as Mrs.fun is bi. I don't mean to sound like I don't care, but We don't play separate. Its not like the females stop bi just to hang out with me. Should one need help like a flat tire, sure I'm headed out to help with any situation. Its not like I could not do friendly things. There is always going to be more than just sex for me personally with playmates. I don't know if this is advice, just my perspective. Ya know, This would have been a good discussion thread in the forums section. If you wanted the viewpoints from others. But if you are more comfortable in the blogs thats cool. The blogs are kinda new to me, but I am hangin out here some. I added ya two our friends list but should I get annoying just let me know. Its all good |
Posted 03-26-2008 at 10:05 AM by fun4Ds |
| | Hi Alyssa~ Welcome to the Swingers Board. I think a question you should ask yourself is if you're even interested in having sex with others. Are you considering this because you want/need (as in your boyfriends' case) sex with lots of different people? Or, are you considering swinging only because you're trying to make your boyfrieind happy? LM |
Posted 03-27-2008 at 07:00 PM by LikeMinds321 |
| | If I told myself I wasn't interested in having sex with other people than I would be lying. They way I put it to myself is, when you masterbabte you think of others and if they were there in that moment you would very much enjoy it, so why wouldn't you enjoy having sex with others? I am doing this not to please him but because I want us to have an open and honest relationship that will work, and because I'm curious. I don't think I will really know until I try. |
Posted 03-27-2008 at 07:39 PM by Alyssa879 |
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